How do I spend time with my teenage son?!
I just do it! It’s one of my main priorities in life right now.
I try and make pancakes at least once a week. Pancakes are one of his favorite foods. He is usually in a great mood while eating them, so it allows us to have very open conversations. So making his favorite foods is always a plus!
I also make a point to show interest in the things he enjoys. If he is streaming a show on Netflix, watching some YouTube video, gaming or even playing with his legos, I always ask, “Buddy, what are you doing?” Even if I know the answer, I ask. He usually begins by answering my question, but we somehow end our conversation knowing a little bit more about each other.
There are also times when he wants to spend time with me, and I’m busy or doing my own thing. Because I know it won’t last too long, I try and drop everything for that moment. He appears out of no where in my bedroom, lays across the bed, and asks some random question. The questions are usually lead with “Mommy, what if”, or “Mommy, when you were my age??….” . I love this line of questioning, so I’m always happy to answer any question he throws out, no matter how odd. Of course, after I’ve answered his question, I ask him the same question. By answering the question, it usually allows him to open up about his daily life, school, or whatever is going on in his head at the moment.
But just like his entrance, his exit is even faster! He slithers off my bed and tip toe’d out of the room! POOF! He’s gone. We’ve had our special moment, and we are both left feeling a bit closer.
This week we spent some time watching the first season of Steven Universe. I actually like the show a lot. We figured out he loves any and all shows where the kid, male or female is between the ages of 12-14, sort of different, and likes adventure. This basically sums my son up in a nutshell. He identifies with these shows, and they are usually produced very well, so I don’t have a hard time watching them. After watching the first episode, I took out my pencil and sketch pad and drew Steven.
My son was intrigued enough to ask me about my drawing skills and even told me about the art class he is taking this semester. Although he says he isn’t the best artist, I tried to give him some positive reinforcement, and I let him know, the beauty of art is in the eye of the beholder. He likes the idea of that. We got through about 4 episodes, and he said last night, “you will love season 2!” Whenever he speaks in future tense, I know he is really saying, so will we watch all of the seasons together? Will this be our thing right now? Instead of answering those questions, I simply say, “Yeah! I can’t wait!” He smiled and headed to bed.
I have to constantly remember that spending time with my teenager won’t always be easy, but when it happens, I must live in the moment!